Our batch-mate Somadasa related how, he and a
batch-mate of ours, let us name him ‘K’, went looking for suitable life
partners, after internship, in the year 1966, using the services of a
professional match-maker also called the ‘Kapuwa’ in Sinhalese. It was
‘K’ who was looking for a suitable bride and our handsome Somadasa,
accompanied him in the visits.
The first prospective bride was from a very wealthy business family with a promise of a car, house etc, but the girl was dark and obese and ‘K’ did not want to proceed further. The second one was from the Kandyan district. After a suitable reception and the betel offering by the prospective bride, the marriage broker of the girl’s party had harsh words for the parent’s accompanying the male’s party. He scolded them for bringing an unmarried handsome Somadasa, with them. Apparently the bride to be had expressed a preference for Somadasa and declined ‘K’.
The third party they went to visit did not suit ‘K’, but the bride to be, had subsequently confided to her mother that she would like to marry Somadasa, the friend who accompanied the prospective groom. This developed further through the marriage broker and ended up in marriage. They had two sons and Somadasas wife was a very devoted wife. They visited me on 16/9/07, full of smiles and we shared many a joke of olden days. Somadasa died peacefully in his sleep in February 2008.
The first prospective bride was from a very wealthy business family with a promise of a car, house etc, but the girl was dark and obese and ‘K’ did not want to proceed further. The second one was from the Kandyan district. After a suitable reception and the betel offering by the prospective bride, the marriage broker of the girl’s party had harsh words for the parent’s accompanying the male’s party. He scolded them for bringing an unmarried handsome Somadasa, with them. Apparently the bride to be had expressed a preference for Somadasa and declined ‘K’.
The third party they went to visit did not suit ‘K’, but the bride to be, had subsequently confided to her mother that she would like to marry Somadasa, the friend who accompanied the prospective groom. This developed further through the marriage broker and ended up in marriage. They had two sons and Somadasas wife was a very devoted wife. They visited me on 16/9/07, full of smiles and we shared many a joke of olden days. Somadasa died peacefully in his sleep in February 2008.
My friend Daya Jayasinghe sent me the following story about such a
visit done by one of his uncles, to a village in Hanguranketa in the
1940s. A ‘Kapuwa’ – match maker - had arranged a prospective bride and
Daya’s uncle went there accompanied by some of his close relatives to
see the bride. The prospective bride-groom, holding the respected
position of a village headman, was wearing a smart ‘Redde’ ie a white
sarong and coat. This was the traditional dress of a Sinhalese village
gentleman of those days. The party was received with due ceremony. Tea
was served. The bride made her appearance offering the traditional
clutch of betel leaves to the prospective groom. The groom was impressed
with the prospective bride and gave his assent for the union. Then the
message was conveyed that the bride was not willing to marry a person
wearing a ‘redde’. She wanted to marry a person wearing the newly
emerging fashion of trousers introduced by the British. The match was
terminated because of this.
At the traditional speech thanking the girls’ party for having given them all courtesy, an elderly relative declaimed ‘If we had known about this we would have come here without wearing the redde’. ('Reddhe nathuwa enda thibuna'). It meant having come visiting with the prospective groom wearing trousers. It also meant having come visiting without wearing any clothes, namely naked. This was received with much laughter by the assembled crowd and the party ended with smiles all round.
At the traditional speech thanking the girls’ party for having given them all courtesy, an elderly relative declaimed ‘If we had known about this we would have come here without wearing the redde’. ('Reddhe nathuwa enda thibuna'). It meant having come visiting with the prospective groom wearing trousers. It also meant having come visiting without wearing any clothes, namely naked. This was received with much laughter by the assembled crowd and the party ended with smiles all round.
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