Tales retold, Joe Kaantha, Dougie

Patients disappearing

When I met Joe Kantha recently, I asked him what he was doing. He replied that he had his usual problem namely that wherever he went and worked he worked so efficiently that all the patients got cured and did not turn up any more  in the clinic. Such was the efficiency of his treatment that the GP practice went bankrupt.

Stories by Dougie

            Our batch-mate Dougals Arulanandam, was ever a jovial person. I met him after a long time in the UK in 1976. He was retired but was working as Consultant Geriatrician on and off. We had an enjoyable chat. He related the following stories.

1. Dougie was with Sydney Hettiaratchi our batch-mate at Trinity. One day Sydney had been ‘gated’ for some misdemeanor inside the Trinity premises. The master who ‘gated’ him, Mr.Jacob Mary Jacob our junior batch student’s father, while shopping in the Kandy town, thought that he saw Sydney walking ahead of him. He walked fast behind the presumed Sydney and gave him a slap on the back to see that he had mistaken someone else for Sydney. It was time for the master to look foolish in front of a large crowd. He apologized profusely to the injured party and vanished from the scene quickly.
2. Dougie was working at Medamahanuwara as Medical Officer of Health, in the late 1960s. He said that while trekking on a foot path, to go to a remote village, he was surprised by wild elephants and had to beat a hasty and breathless retreat. Luckily the elephants did not chase him very far.
3. Unlicensed liquor sales were common in the remote villages. The two brands sold were the cheaper Gal-Oya arrack, also called ‘Gal’, produced from sugar cane molasses and the more expensive Coconut arrack, also called ‘Pol’ produced from coconut toddy. If you wanted to acquire these from the shops in these remote villages, there was a secret pass word used, as police raids were a perpetual danger. It was ‘Ballata Gahana Badu’ (The item you use to throw at dogs) for ‘Gal’ which meant ‘stone’. For Coconut arrack the term used was ‘Deiyanta gahana badu’ (The item you smash in front of Gods) for ‘Pol’ which meant coconut.